As I was driving home yesterday, I realized that I was bone tired. So tired that driving home took real effort. Since I tend to analyze my life to its highest and lowest depths - I wanted to know why? I came to the realization that an encounter earlier in the day with my husband had drained me and was continuing to drain me. He wanted me to do something. I did not want to do it and stuck to my guns even after his second phone call to 'push' me over to his way of thinking. For once, disappointing myself trumped disappointing him.
I am bone tired because my life is peopled with those who are constantly pulling my energy to satisfy what they want. They are all so used to me 'giving in' that my desires are not even considered. The list is long and I am tired. I asked myself, "Who is pouring into me?" "Who is looking for ways to make my life easier or to give me the exact comfort that I need?"
The answer was - no one. I resolved at that moment to pour into myself by making firm agreements with me to honor my preferences first and above all. I am committed. I will let you know how it comes out.
No comments:
Post a Comment